After recently watching a BBC iPlayer documentary on revenge porn, I became so angered by our current patriarchal society which has yet again placed women on a fragile pedestal built by male ideals. In case you haven’t seen it, in the documentary by ex-Love Island contestant Zara McDermott, she opens up about being a victim of revenge porn whilst looking for love in the villa. For those who aren’t familiar with the term, revenge porn is defined as: revealing or sexually explicit images or videos of a person posted on the internet, typically by a former sexual partner, without the consent of the subject and in order to cause them distress or embarrassment.
The root of my anger was a statement Zara made. Whilst explaining how her former school tackled an incident of revenge porn in which she was involved, she admits that she was suspended by the school. The male who shared the image was not. One can only assume that the school felt that if the image wasn’t sent in the first place, then it never could have been shared therefore the source of the incident, and the blame, must lie with Zara. The powerful message this sends females throughout society is “Your body is a problem for us. Your sexuality is an issue, and we must protect our men against your body confidence”.
To remove one’s clothing is a physical form of liberation
For centuries, women have been held up as a symbol of sexuality, desire and passion and the central figure of the most iconic images and stories in history. Mona Lisa, Helen of Troy, Eve, The Birth of Venus, Olympia. I could go on. The point being that man placed woman in a box ticked “sexually desirable objects” but what we missed was the small print – “only when I say so”.
It seems to me that society is only comfortable with a woman embracing her sexual self on its own terms. Controlled images of overly sexualised women are coming at us left right and centre – page 3 of the sun, music videos or porn to name but a small few. Yet there doesn’t seem to be judgement on these women. But share a naked, empowering picture with a partner, lover or stranger that captures you at your most confident, sexual self? HELL NO! Why do we kick up such a fuss when a woman chooses of her own free will to share her body, embracing her full naked wonderful self? We can’t lean into a Beyonce inspired ‘feeling myself’ moment but sending an unwanted “dick pic” seems to be standard practice.
27.3% of females were shown nude vs. 8.5% of males
Although this topic surely has two sides. There are those who would wholeheartedly agree that a woman is surely entitled to share images of herself on her own terms, on whatever platform she chooses wearing (or not) whatever she likes. A pictorial ‘go fuck yourself’ to the patriarchy one might say. On the other hand, there are also those who arguing that women who sexualise themselves in this way are still appeasing the male population and therefore we should be hiding our bodies under a bushel. In Melinda Gates’, The Moment of Lift, she puts it quite succinctly – “A woman’s pleasure, especially her sexual pleasure, was terrifying to the keepers of the social order. If women were free to pursue their own pleasure, it would strike at the core of unspoken male code, ‘You exist for my pleasure’”.”
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